I came to a great realization last week. I don't enjoy my life enough. I have such a great life. A wonderful husband; a precious, funny little girl; a precious boy/girl on the way; a terriffic job; Chris has a terriffic job; a healthy family; we're getting to build our dream house; have wonderful friends; a great church and most of all an amazing God who regardless of whether I have the above listed things, loves me like crazy.
When Christina, Kerry and I were driving back from Tulsa yesterday, we got into a conversation that we always seem to have when we get together for a drive...see, last year, right after we got back from our shopping trip, Christina got terrible news. Her husband Bryson went in to have a MRI on his back. The results of the MRI came back with a tumor on his kidney - not related to his back problems. Their lives were temporarily turned upside down. Right around Christmas, he had his kidney removed and the cancer was gone. He had his last body scan last month and it was clear, so now the scans are much less frequent. It all turned out o.k. But when she talks about the day Bryson called to tell her about the tumor, I get a lump in my throat. She talks about sitting in her car by herself and crying - thinking that she was going to have to raise her kids by herself. She said she gave herself some time to cry and be irrational, then she made herself suck it up and take care of things. It is in these moments, I think, that God allows people to shine. In the midst of this tragedy, this is a family that showed amazing strength and faith in a situation that didn't make sense. It wasn't fair. People were watching to see how they handled it though. It's true that far too many people don't get to have a happy ending. But, when Bryson and Christina were going through it and handling it with grace, they weren't sure whether it would have a happy ending.
I want to live my life that way whether I'm going through true struggles like these, or the small things in my life that happen that I perceive as true struggles. People are always watching to see how we handle what life throws at us. I would love to show them a picture of how Christ would handle it.
I want to find joy in all things - regardless of my situation. Simply because I have a God who loves me. I want that to be enough.